All you need is ...

FACE PAINT!!! Why is it that when you really need face paint you can't find it? I can't tell you how many times that I have said to myself, "You know I really need to paint my face blue right now!" You just never know when you might need it. Papa Smurf look? Blue! Need that jaundice look? Yellow! Need that Joker look? White! I'm surprised someone hasn't opened an all night face paint joint. I could guarantee that those Green Berets on night patrol in Newport might need a touch-up around 3 AM. Frankly, I'm going to petition my Senator to ensure that every decent citizen has 24x7 access to high quality face paint.

Tainted but unpainted,

Knuckles